Sacred Ground

I know that if you've followed this blog very long that you have heard me talk
about my Sweet Farmer. I also am aware that I speak of him as if he is the Prince of Persia. (It's actually quite embarrassing to him sometimes).

He is no myth. He's a real life man with struggles and weaknesses as any man. But to me- well,
he really is somewhat of a gentle giant of a man. Not just to me but to my grown children, and my grandsons.

He came along at a time when we were all hopelessly floundering. I was several years out of a tangled and complex marriage of 19 years that had been, for the most part, painful and wounding. I was one of those silly girls that thought I was doing the right thing by staying. Perservering. Faithful to a fault. It all feels now like a bad car-wreck of which my children and I spent years recovering. We would have made it. Without him. But I'm so glad we didn't.

He didn't exactly save us. But there WAS something very redeeming about him. I did dream of this man as a little girl- the prince you want to marry, the good man, the kind man, the generous man, handsome, tall, good-looking. The one that loves your children and plays with your grandchildren. He saved the dream.

Today he's working on a little piece of land in front of the house. It is as close to a Zen garden as I will ever know.It has that tone and feel today- that peaceful, languishing, tended tone.

He has carefully tilled around these pecan trees, and then leveled it perfectly so that he can flood irrigate it with no water waste. I step out on my front porch and watch him work.

I realize why watching him satisfies something deep in me. He cares for the land like he cares for his family and for his animals - with a tenderness, and careful hand, with a studied observation, and a natural hunger to make all things better by his efforts.


And I am part of this garden now that I view from my front porch. I have been carefully loved and tended and  I have rooted like these trees that prosper and produce healthy crops year after year.

He floods it later and is proud of the fact that not a trail of water leaks from his leveled plain. He wants me to take a picture. 

I'm a little proud too that for now this carefully tended acre is full to almost overflowing, like my heart and my admiration for this simple, loving, sweet, sweet farmer. (now you know)

Someday, our ashes will be spread on this piece of land. I know its not a fancy place. It's a small part of the farm that happens to be my front porch view. But it represents a sacred place to us where love was grown, tilled, worked and tended. Cared for very, very well.

that BECOMING moment...

Finally painted a little 8x8 that I was pleased with that says spring and cherry blossoms. Sweet Farmer says, "why does her hair go out like that?"
and I say- BECAUSE. it's whimsical, nostalgic... he doesn't get it. But that's okay.
I start to paint a more realistic portrait
and there she goes ...off on her own trail, her own story, her own little world.
It is one of my favorite travel destinations - that Alice-In Wonderland-rabbit-hole of my own imagination.
It is a room of my own.
Where do people go without this option in their lives? Is it arrogant of me to feel sorry for those who have lost the ability to imagine, to play, to design little vignettes, to paint their dreams, to write out the beats of their hearts, to sing from that sacred place . Where for moments in time there is no sense of failure or success, worry or demands.
 It is just YOU spilling out, breathing out, laying it out- one texture, one color, one line, one twist of the brush. Where you smile at this innate object before you as you watch the life energy poured into it become something tangible, touchable, like the cherry bud that became the blossom overnight.
Don't you love that becoming moment?

She will RISE AGAIN.

SHE WILL RISE AGAIN

I find myself sketching Japanese girls in my art journal these days.
I still can't wrap my head around the suffering and the devastation.
I'm not sure I want to.
My mind can't handle it but my heart weeps for the Japanese people and all those affected.
I've been practicing Japanese symbols and I've written several
Japanese proverbs in my art journal.
I just want to honor their courage and struggle in some small way.
Maybe you'll enjoy bits of their quotes and wisdom as I do.

"Tigers die and leave their skins, people die and leave their names."

" If you are understanding everything, you must be misinformed."

"The reverse side also has a reverse side."

"If you believe everything you read, better not read."

"Vision without action is a day-dream. Action without vision is a nightmare."

"First a man takes a drink, then the drink takes a drink,
then the drink takes the man."

"When the character of man is not clear to you,
look at his friends."

"Even a sheet of paper has two side."

"Fast ripe, fast rotten".

"Forgiving the unrepentant is like trying to
draw on water."

"Money grows on the tree of persistence."

"The nail that sticks up is hammered down."

Which one resonates with you? Do you have any others
you could add?

A little spoiled...

There is that strange pull in me this time of year when I look forward to the spring and the new hay fields and future work, and a part of my heart that dreads the long hours, the time away from paint, the time away from Sweet Farmer. I've had a lazy, dreamy winter and I have spent so much time in the house in front of the wood stove that I've gotten really soft... and spoiled.
I keep working in my journal and turning out faces to sell. Yes, I'm definitely painting to sell and Sweet Farmer hates it. But I have this venue, this window of opportunity to sell these faces, to let them fly me to Italy and I'm going for it. I'm still learning a little bit although there is not real art-muscle stretching going on over here.
WORK... real work.. well, it's easy to take the easy road these days. But it is coming.

Speaking of real work. My parents just celebrated a 54th wedding anniversary. I was visiting there and I got on you-tube and played "Until the Twelfth of Never" for them while they were still cuddled in bed. It was my parent's favorite song when they met, but my grandmother wouldn't let my mom play it at her wedding because she thought Elvis was evil. lol. It was such a beautiful song- it made me cry like a baby in front in them. The road hasn't been that easy for them lately, but they are strong spirits, never blaming circumstances, just taking the high road hike every time. It makes me proud.

So down deep, I know I have the genes to do the hard work when I have to. May God give us all a new spring in our hearts and spirits.

Twisted Twin Strikes again...

You knew this one was bound to be coming with all the sweet
faces I've been doing. Too many sweet things are not good for a person.
I called this one "Moon's Reflection" but I think I got the model from a wrinkle
cream commercial- and I reallllly hate those. Hence, the evil eyebrows.

This one was fun and I like the hat. I call it: "Grateful". Because I took her
right down to Tinnie's and hung her on the wall. I'm feeling very inspired
knowing I have a public place to hang them and possibly sell them.

Sweet Farmer and I had a DRAW OFF the other night with a little wine and cheese.
It was our Monday night entertainment. We drew the fox off the cover of the National Geographic.
I was really proud of his because he rarely draws - and out popped a great fox.

Very different styles but close to the original.
It was a fun evening.
I'm headed to see my grandsons this weekend.
Happy Drawing.

OH and thanks for loving my twisted girl (last post). She's growing on me
with all her imperfections.

Inevitable Realities and ART

Sometimes.. do you paint a piece that just makes you want to scream?
Throw a fit and squeal like a little girl? Sometimes art can be terribly frustrating.
If I had a genie and 3 wishes, I would ask for world peace and a cure for cancer and then I
would ask for an art teacher to show up at my house AND HELP ME FIX THIS PAINTING!
Sometimes, one simple mark, several tiny adjustments can fix a portrait. But I can't see it.

BUT, I can SEE it which is so frustrating- my taste in art is ahead of my skill.
Art And Fear says: "Vision is always ahead of execution and it should be. Vision, Uncertainty,
and Knowledge of Materials are inevitabilities that all artist must acknowledge and learn from:
vision is always ahead of execution, knowledge of materials is your contact with reality, and uncertainty is a virtue." this didn't make me feel better but i did quit obsessing and inwardly stomping on my right brain's deficiencies

I remember that it is this frustration that is my art teacher- it teaches me about the next piece.It is the FEAR that I'm never going to get it that challenges me to stand up and defiantly paint another and another. "The artist's life is frustrating not because the passage is slow, but because he imagines it to be fast."

I want it fixed now. NOW, I tell you. When I asked Sweet Farmer to help me problem solve, he looked at her and said, "it looks like she's been in a bad farming accident".

He's buried, now, in the back orchard under a pile of rocks.

Not really, I'll let him live because he's the only one around who will provoke me enough to fix her. IT MAY TAKE awhile- but she will toss her pretty head at him(you) someday and say, "THERE, what do you think of me now BIG BOY!"

any suggestions will be taken under consideration and will not provoke an attack :)

Goodness Followed Her

Goodness Followed Her
I simply couldn't help myself. I have this adorable little niece who posted this picture
recently on her facebook and gave me permission to paint it.
I really like this one. For the life of me I couldn't
photograph the different shades in her face because
her skin is so glowey and youthful- which is great for the
painting but not the photograph.
I'm realizing that I'm happier with paintings I do
from good photographs -but that is somewhat
of a dilemma for me.
Tinnie's (the place that had my art show) called and said
a special little girl was having a birthday in May and WOULD
I MIND leaving the paintings there until then????
I said, "heck no! I need them back to put under the bed you silly
people!"
Not really, of course, I was thrilled. But now I need to check with those
that bought originals to see if they will also be
willing to leave them.
And I get to ADD more.
Is the universe lined up with me or what!!!
Actually, God gets all the credit if that is what
I am receiving at this time.
Gratefulness drips from each brush stroke these days.
Lots of my girlfriends are at Artful Journey.
It's been a year since my daughter and I made that awesome trip.
Little did I know what a great investment
that would be for the both of us.
My daughter now has her own website.
check out
www.crazyconsuela.com
GOODNESS FOLLOWED HER.
I hope it's following you too!

Etsy Store!

I have an Etsy Store! I promise not to make this blog about the store
but from time to time friends have asked me where to find
my paintings, prints, cards or lotions and now
I hope that this will make it easier for everyone.
I hope to have more posted soon and I will give you updates.
Anyway, I enjoy shopping on my friend's blogs and Etsy Stores- finding something
different and creative and one-of-a-kind items.
I think we all enjoy supporting each other and handmade items.
So check it out!
ETSY STORE

ART SHOW! A success- whew.....

one of the front doors
THE DAY of the BIG art SALE!
If you click on the above image you will see my name written on the door! I was so excited when I walked up and realized they had even decorated the windows.

The next thing I knew the girls were leading me over to counter to show me flowers that I had received from my Mom, my daughter and dearest friend! okay, I'm dropping tears by now.

But that was just the beginning of all the love and good things I would embrace for this special evening.

Friends came in from my church, my bookclub, my neighborhood, my yoga class, my art guild, all the way from ARizona, my HEART friends, little kids, older friends, new friends, lots of new faces, timid artists I could encourage, artists who had mentored me, artists who wanted to know, "what's next?". Even Sweet Farmer and his shop buddies (well my buddies too). I was so wired last night I could barely sleep.

 I SOLD 8 originals!!!

11 prints!!

25 card sets!!!

Many large single cards!!!

My art box!

ABOUT $1600.00 worth in one night as best I could tell.

THAT DOUBLED MY INVESTMENT PEOPLE!!

Yes, I was worried. I was a little naive about how much an artist really invested to show their paintings. I had not counted all the costs like framing, matting, printing, postcards, postage, staging, etc. That doesn't even count the time to create the art.

I learned so much!

But BOY I'm glad it paid off! WHEW! And these paintings will hang for another 2 weeks so I expect that I could sell a few more in that time. 

But the greatest gift- HONESTLY- was the time people took out of their busy lives to come out and support me and encourage me. It would have felt successful to me to just have had the guts to hang them and to know that lots of people liked them. BUT BUYING THEM IS SUCH A VALIDATION, I admit.

And those of you who have encouraged me from afar, THANK YOU and wow! dreams happen if you just dare to be brave and true to your calling deep within you.

Italy - HERE I COME!

Can you tell- I'm still running on a heavy dose of relief and unadulterated JOY!

One day the sky opened up and showed me God's heart.

Heart sightings. This one is for Chrissy- if you don't know Chrissy you must go visit.
She has one of the most freckled, darling, loving, thoughtful, cheery hearts of any one I know.
I met her at Artful Journey. EVERYONE loves her. Who can say that??
You'll love her too. And she'll introduce you to the most wonderful people.
And stuff. Beware. She's caused me to pull my credit card out several times.
She started heart sightings and she collects them from all over the world.
Who says I can't take a good picture?? This was with my old camera outside my front door (2008)
It made me cry.
I hope you feel the love.
Find your own heart sighting and send it on to Chrissy.